🎉 Ah, January – the month where gym memberships, diets, and the quest for the perfect beach body flood our timelines! 🏋️‍♂️ But hey, who needs a summer-ready body when you can rock those mankinis all year round, right? 😎

Now, let me spill the beans (or should I say, the kale?) on my recent journey with Zoe’s personalized nutrition program. Spoiler alert: it involves gut health, food reactions, and a sprinkle of outstanding results! Check out my journey here.

But hold on to your salad bowls, folks! 🥗 This month, let’s dive into the wild world of processed foods, where some ingredients are as mysterious as the Bermuda Triangle. 🤔

Processed Food Industry 

Since the 1950s, the food industry has transformed faster than a superhero changing costumes. Fast-food chains, ready-made meals, and the dessert market – it’s like a foodie revolution! 🍔🍕 However, the not-so-super side effect? A skyrocketing obesity rate since the groovy 1970s, and a bucket load of digestive problems!

Before Zoe, I had a personal trainer who advised a diet of 120g of protein a day. The catch? To get that much protein I had to eat ultra-processed foods, in the form of a pudding that promised muscles and TBF were like a party for my taste buds. 🎉 But my gut didn’t appreciate the celebration. So, back to basics I went – natural foods, meal prep, and the occasional yoga and gym class for movement!

Ultra-processed foods are like being in a science experiment you didn’t sign up for. 🤷‍♂️ Ever wondered if a synthetic emulsifier could replace an egg? Or if seed oil could outshine dairy fat? Having worked in the food industry, I can confirm – the long-term impact on health is outstanding… in a not-so-outstanding way.

At Complete Health Clinic, our ethos revolves around achieving balance – both in life and, of course, ensuring your colon is a happy camper! We believe no foods should be off-limits unless there’s an allergy or intolerance at play. However, it’s crucial to note that ultra-processed foods aren’t exactly the fuel your body thrives on. Just like putting the wrong fuel in a vehicle, it won’t optimise your engine’s performance and might lead to some unpleasant hiccups along the way.

That’s why during February we have a special offer, if you opt for a colonic session with either myself or Anthony, you can also bundle in an intolerance test, saving you some pennies! BOOK ONLINE

**Colonic treatment is £80 and intolerance test costs £179, bundle costs £239 saving £20**

Additionally, I provide stool sampling services to delve into the intricacies of your gut health. If anyone requires a referral for addressing Small Intestinal Bacterial Overgrowth (SIBO), feel free to reach out directly to organize the referral at ask@completehealthclinic.co.uk.


Let’s talk sugar

The ninja assassin hiding in our daily eats. Did you know there are over 57 ways to say “sugar”? Talk about sweet talk! 🍭

Sucrose, aka the sugar we love in our tea or coffee, is a sneaky mix of glucose and fructose. But wait, there’s more! Manufacturers sprinkle it on breakfast cereals, fizzy pop, and ice cream like it’s confetti. Your body has to break it down like a DJ remixing a track before absorbing it into your bloodstream.

Now, enter the FODMAPs – the short-chain carbs (sugars) that your small intestine treats like an unwanted party crasher. 🎉

Glucose, the monosaccharide rockstar, can be found in nuts, veggies, and grains. Your body loves it and uses it as energy, sometimes under the stage name “dextrose.” 🌟

Fructose, the natural fruit sweetheart, needs a liver makeover before it can hit the energy scene. Be cautious, though – too much fructose can turn your liver into a disco ball of fat. But fear not, the fructose in fruits and veggies comes with fibre and water, slowing down its entry into your bloodstream.

What are the sugar names to look for?

Added sugars and processed foods: some of the names to look for:

  • High fructose corn syrup
  • Dextrose
  • Maltodextrin
  • Agave syrup
  • Agave nectar
  • Raw sugar
  • Cane crystals
  • Barley Malt
  • Ethyl maltol
  • Fruit juice concentrate
  • Galactose
  • Honey
  • Maple syrup
  • Molasses


💡 Word of wisdom: if it ends in “ose,” it’s probably sugar. If it screams “syrup” or “sugar,” well, it’s sugar. 🕵️‍♀️

Soft drinks, flavoured coffees, and low-fat goodies – the sugar culprits among us. 🥤 Be warned, excess sugar doesn’t just wreck your pearly whites; it’s the mastermind behind obesity, metabolic mayhem, and heart and fatty liver drama. 😱

So, balance is the key – embrace the Man-Kini (or bikini) body with a dash of humour and a plate full of whole, natural foods. 🥦🍇 Who knew reducing sugar could be this entertaining? Cheers to a sweet, yet balanced, life! 🎉🌈